Running Into A Burning Building

 

Why,

why do I keep running into this burning building. I know it’s hot, I know it’s dangerous, and it’s pure insanity. Every time I run in I get hurt, I feel betrayed, I lose love, I am along. At this point my mind is in a severely disordered state of mind (Merriam-Webster Dictionary). I’m lost. I keep running back into this fire because I’m trying to fill a void. I feel empty, hollow. If I turn to drugs, alcohol, or people, I can pretend for a little while that I’m secure, the void is gone, I’m not lost, I do have it together and I’m not losing control. I can’t keep running into this building. At some point it’s going to fall on me. I’m tired of these sores. I wake up, and hate I ran into the fire, it burned. It continues to burn worse each time I go in. This time it cost me my freedom, next time it may cost me my life.

My Serenity

I’m tired, I can’t keep running. I’m done but I don’t know how to stop running into the fire. I’m surrounded by fire; negative talk, negative actions, negative thoughts. Heck, “I can’t see the forest for the trees,” Nicholas Sparks. I can’t see the rainbow in the mist of all this rain, but I want to so bad. All I have is this little book some old man gave me on a store parking lot, The New Testament. So, I guess I’ll flip through it. Well, check this out,

“Come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest.” “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart.” “And you will find rest for your souls.” “For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Mathew 11:28-30)

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Be a Warrior and Survive

Warrior: A person engaged or experienced in warfare; broadly; a person engaged in some struggle or conflict, poverty warriors. (Merriam-Webster)

Survivor: A person who survives; to remain alive after death; to continue to function or prosper despite (WITH STAND) (Merriam-Webster)

These two words have something in common, they both take a brave and strong individual that can find the will, want, and need to fight. Many times we hear the saying, “life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.” The thing is, that is what scares so many of us in life, not knowing what we’re going to get. Paralyzing us into a stalemate state. Well, I’ve realized it’s time to stop looking at life as full of scary and frightening unknowns. Instead, I decided to look at life as if it’s an adventurous game and life itself as my component. This is when the warrior and survivor in me begins to rise. Now will you allow it to rise in you?

NO Life, You Can’t Defeat Me!

In life you must be a warrior because you are constantly fighting a war. I believe it was Paul that said, “when I would do good evil is present, and we are constantly at war with ourselves,” Roman 7:21-23. Counselors or not we are all human, we all have some form of issues just as anyone else. Why, because this is life. Life has its way of teaching you, training you, rewarding you, or sometimes destroying you.

Today, this is all I want to say, “BE A Warrior and Survive.” So many times, life kicks the crap out of you, slap you with hurt, uppercut you with betrayal, kick you with lost and sometimes drag you with pain. You cry, you shout, but don’t stop fighting, fight back. There’s a scripture that says, “According to your faith be it unto you.” Mat9:29. In other words, continue to believe that you can go on. Continue to believe that there’s better on the other side of a messed-up situation. Don’t be afraid what is coming next because there’s been a period of nothing but bad falling in your lap. I believe it was Job in the bible that continued to have problems back to back, losing everything he had including his children. However, he was blessed because he decided to be a warrior, a survivor and decided life wasn’t going to get the best of him. Job 1-42. Now I didn’t say Job didn’t get weak, at one time he said and felt that he wanted to give up. However, he placed his hand over his mouth and realized that it’s better if he continue to hold on and push through the calamity he was going through. Therefore, Job was blessed.

I leave this with you, be a fighter, a warrior and survive. Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith Yah, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”