Self Fulfilment, Purpose of Life

What is my Purpose?

Have you ever asked the question, “What is my purpose in life?” Why would we ask ourselves that question? After all, we are helpers, therefore we see ourselves as having a purpose. We fill fulfilled because we help others and that gives us a sense of fulfilment, a sense of purpose or does it? Have you ever question yourself, “Am I doing enough?” “Am I really making a difference?” Perhaps you have gotten to the point of just going through the motions.
You see, to have self fulfilment and have a purpose in life is deep. It’s difficult to have true self-fulfillment if you lack being in good health, rather that’s mind, or body, mentally or physically? Trust me I’ve been there. How can one have true purpose of life if one only considers their purpose for living in one aspect of life? What happens when that which was considered your purpose of being is gone? So as a counselor you may say, “my purpose is to help others,” however still filling a void and dissatisfaction in other areas of your life. It sucks. It’s like a place between gray and dark, shallow and hollow.
Although you may experience these emotions and ideas while on the journey of life, self fulfilment and purpose can be found throughout your entire life. Happiness is key, peace and harmony are a must. Once you begin to feel happiness you begin to feel peace and a sense of harmony. Once those feelings are in place all the negative feelings are washed away and voids are filled because there are no more room for negative thinking or negative energy, and finally true purpose is found.

Achieving Happiness

So, how does one get to that happiness, peace, and harmony? When I begin to look at myself and wonder what it was that I was missing, that is when I begin the journey of becoming who God, intended for me to be. Not by lingering in the what if’s, not by wondering in the past, but by realizing it’s the now, the moment at hand that can change. Also realizing that I can change it. I begin to realize that the pass is the pass and the future is the only thing that can be manipulated by thoughts and actions. Therefore, I begin to find happiness which began in good health. Feeling good in the body helps me to feel good in the mind. Feeling good in the mind began the journey of self fulfilment. I became clear upon what I wanted. I wanted my outward life to reflect how my inward life felt which was rich, energetic, honorable. I had finally figured it out. Finally, I had reached happiness, which then came peace and harmony.

I Figured It Out

I accomplished my happiness by learning that hurting mentally or physically, no matter my job tittle or degrees on the wall, started within my mind. My thoughts affected my body then my body affected my work ethic. I learned when I begin to think differently and positively, I begin to take care of my health. My body begins to transform, thus my way of life all around begin to renew. I had begun my journey of self fulfilment.
We all have different experiences in life. Some trials may test our physical body while others our mental states but at the end of the day it’s how you view what is thrown at you to achieve fulfilment and purpose in life. I leave with you a passage from the bible; Third John 1:2 Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prosperity.

Empowering Us

We are resilient, we are helpers, we are experts…we are human.  As a counselor we are seen as helpers to many clients that suffers from harsh mind altering conditions; depression, anxiety, bipolar, etc. We are exposed to the hurt, pain, frustration, sometimes trauma filled experiences of our clients on a day to day bases. However, because of who we are and the resilience that we possess, we continue to do our jobs as experts in the fill of helping. We continue to take on the dark secrets of others, and the shame that has fulfilled their lives. We are excited to see the evidence of our work when finally they are able to hold their heads up high and walk out of our door. However, what happened to all the baggage that has been dumped on to us? Who will help us as we continue with the wear and tear on our own mind and bodies?

Many times as counselors, we may find ourselves watching the clock periodically throughout the day hoping that time flies by. It’s not because we dislike our job, it’s simply because we are mentally drained, and emotionally exhausted. Ultimately, the lack of focus, may cause us to miss out on important points in our client’s story. Therefore, the client is forced into a state of preparation or back into the state of contemplation. We must stop allowing ourselves to be consumed by the negative energy over time and learn another avenue of how to dispose of it. In other words we must stop the burnout before it stops us and interfere with our clients which are in our society among us desperate to be helped and saved by us.

I know we have different outlets such as conferences to attend, counselor getaways, and other counselors to talk to, but what do we do in the mean time before these events roll around. Where is our outlet? How many of us take our own advice as far as the famous “self-care.” Time and time again we take our work home with us. Many times we have that one case of the day that we can’t shake. Trying to come up with different strategies and hoping for the best for our client. Meanwhile, our mind never stops working. This is why I felt this blog is so important for us, the counselors. We can know that we need to avoid the burnout or compassion fatigue, but unless we actually take the time out for ourselves every day or every other day, burnout still wins in the end. How many times have you painted just to relax, took a warm relaxing bath with music and candles, made time to visit your good friends, played sports or watched your favorite sport live, lastly but not least have read a good book? In the book The Resilient Practitioner, Thomas Skovholt, gives a self-care action plan, speaks about resiliency, and provide a revised resiliency inventory for us to use.

As counselors we do a lot, we take on a lot, why not embrace ourselves a lot. If we don’t take care of ourselves we will not be able to adequately take care of our clients. I dare you to take care of yourself. There are different techniques and information out here in the world of counseling for us to combat burnout and compassion fatigue let’s use it and continue to be strong, confident, effective in our lives and in our client’s lives.

Be Empowered